A friend told a story recently that she had been excited to share with some of her oldest and dearest friends that she was starting a new project and she invited them to lunch to tell them about it and include them in her enthusiasm. She was proud to be stepping out of her comfort zone to write her first book. To her surprise, their reaction was not exactly overwhelming. Their response was pretty much, “That’s cool. What are you going to order to eat?”
As she told this story, I completed related to how her heart felt by not having them share in her excitement or really offer any support or encouragement. As she sat in her car after lunch, she admitted it stung. She had wanted her long-time friends to be happy for her and have her back. It was hard not to be disappointed and have doubts.
Photo credit: Henrick Edburg
When I made the decision to get back into writing and share it with the world, it was intimidating! It took a truckload of courage on my part. What if it was a complete failure? What if no one read it? What if I wasn’t as good at writing as I always felt I was? What if……? So my approach was that I would give it a try with an audience of trusted friends and family. Of course they would support me because they love me, right? If it never went any further than that circle then I could accept and move on to other endeavors.
The big surprise for me was that the people I expected to embrace my new journey and propel me forward just…..didn’t. It wasn’t that I received criticism, it was that I received…..nothing. Please understand that this is not me laying a guilt trip. We can’t expect everyone in our closest circles to understand or love everything we choose to do. But I also can’t lie and say that it didn’t sting a little. It made me question what I was doing and created a whole mind swirl of doubts. It messed with my confidence and caused me to ask myself if I’d made a mistake for even trying. I had prayed about this. I took my time to let the idea either take hold or die. I felt guided to go for it. Now what? I wondered if this little dream of mine had been silly from the beginning.
Strangely enough, my reading audience began to grow with a ground swell from, believe it or not…..Twitter. People I had connected with on the social media site embraced my blog enthusiastically, leaving comments and sending me messages that what I had written touched them. They shared my site with their connections, they buoyed my spirits, they asked for more. I began to get readers from all over the world – I even had to provide a translate feature on my blog page. I took a chance and moved from my original blog site to another that was more writer and reader friendly. It was a risky move as you never know if your readers will follow. But follow they did, and I began gaining more and more subscribers. Someone who has a large following and who I have a lot of respect for endorsed my site. Other writers recommended my page on theirs. The number of views and subscribers leapt to all new highs. People started asking me for writing advice. Sometimes I have to pinch myself as this is way more than what I could have hoped for and certainly more than I ever expected.
The most important part of this story is not the people who didn’t embrace my dream. It’s that I sought God’s guidance, listened to my heart, took a big leap and it turned out to be something amazing that feeds my soul every day. Even though there were questions and stumbles along the way, I continued to trust that sharing my heart with people was what I was supposed to be doing. Reading the comments and messages I receive continues to fuel the inspiration that becomes my essays, poems and posts.
If there’s a lesson to be learned here, it’s that we shouldn’t look for our approval from other people. We should seek approval from God, honor our giftings, and trust our own hearts. It doesn’t mean all will turn out just as we hoped and dreamed. Sometimes we have to modify our expectations, pivot as needed, and try again. And sometimes things turn out far better than we could ever have imagined. Make 2023 the year you begin to believe in yourself and let your dreams have wings. You may have to adjust, reinvent, and start over, but don’t let the expectations of others undermine what your heart is telling you to do. It might just be one of the best things you’ve ever done.
Cathey, I am not a writer as you know but your writing always inspires me. You also encouraged me to write poems for the August challenge and was very supportive of the ones I wrote so much so that I ended up writing more once the challenge was finished. And surprisingly other people liked them as well. Like you I relied on hearing from God for the inspiration to write them.
I am so glad I’ve meet you in social media and I have learned so much from you. You told me to write from my heart not let fear gets in the way and I listen to your advice. You’re writing is amazing and been sharing it to my family and they too love reading it. Your a gifted writer and you love God as much as I do too.